If I Stay - Movie Review - The shittest YA film to date.

So, against my will I was forced by my sister to see "If I Stay', for her birthday. Having seen the trailer, it looked like a bog standard YA (young adult) movie, with a slight twist in that Mia has the ability to decide whether or not she lives or dies.

The first few scenes in the movie, really weren't all that terrible. Now, I haven't read the book, so I can't talk about it on that scale, but I really liked her parents in the movie, and how they were portrayed. Often times, movies will go for two kinds of parents, the "Embarassing Parents", who will try their absolute hardest to be 'cool' and say the right thing. They'll try to be down with the kids, and instead, everything they do, comes off as cringe-worthy and you find yourself actually agreeing with the cliched kid who rolls their eyes in exasperation, and groans in anticipation of their parents cheesiness.
          Then, you have the "Effortlessly Cool" parents. These are Mia's parents. These are the parents, that have seen it all, done it all, got the t-shirt, the video, the DVD, and wrote the damn book too! There's nothing that can get by these parents, but rather than scold their children for the stupid mistakes they make, they sit 'em down, one-on-one, and talk to them like actual human beings. They'll tell them a story of a similar incident in their youth, and whilst doing so, manage to teach their kids a valuable lesson. These are Mia's parents, and the actors that play them do an effortlessly cool job of portraying the effortlessly cool parents.
         The Chemistry between Chloe Moretz (Mia) and her on-screen parents, is also testament to this, as you believe they are a real family, despite the lacklustre script.

After the crash - which quite frankly was done so poorly, that I felt no emotion or sympathy for the family whatsoever - Mia does a lot of the bog standard "where am I? What happened? Am i dead?" stuff and eventually follows her body to the hospital, by hopping in the Ambulance at the last minute.
Now, technically this is where the film actually begins, Although I use the term "begins" very loosely, as that implies that there is a beginning, middle and end, and with this film it doesn't feel that way at all.

 For the most part the picture you see to your left, is what the film looks like. It's filled to the brim, with "cute" moments like this, designed to show you their burgeoning romance, but in reality most of this film, to me, came across as a discount 'The Fault in Our Stars'.

Let me explain what I mean by that. Anyone who's actually read 'The Fault in Our Stars', knows that it's one of the books, where everything is cute and adorable, every line has some ulterior meaning, and at the end, your heart is broken, and your left crying into your pillow, thinking "WHYYYY, GOD WHYYY!?"
Now the film of 'The Fault in Our Stars', managed to convey most of this perfectly, and whilst the book was still better, the film had the whole "cute" relationship, Quirky characters, every line has an ulteriaor meaning, down. It didn't seem cheesy in tfios, whereas, If I Stay managed to have me rolling my eyes at every turn and at one bit asking, "Who the F*** wrote this shit?!".

The "romance" between the characters, didn't feel real to me. And whilst Chloe Grace Moretz is a fantastic actress, not even she could save this movie.

   Shit like this, in movies, just makes me want to BARF. Now admittedly, if I feel that way, I probably shouldn't be watching Teen Romances, but hey, like I said, I was forced. Somewhat.

In any case, If I Stay was a ball of crap, wrapped in cliches, dipped in cheese, with a little extra fluff. If you're a 13 year old girl, then you will LOVE this movie. Cheesy romaces like this, have you squealing and getting excited, growing up thinking that the hot guy always choses the nerdy girl, or the quiet girl, or the musician born into a family of musicians who somehow thinks she's an outcast. (seriously, who the F*** wrote this shit!?) And this isn't me cussing 13 year old fangirls. Believe me I'm not. I used to be you. But as you get older,  you realise this isn't true, and you subconsciously begin to start to look for something with a little more grit.

So all in all, If I Stay was one of the most disappointing and boring movies I've seen this year. Coming off a year with big blockbuster superhero movies, to this, and you can see why it was lacklustre at best.

I give If I Stay a measly 4/10 stars.

Save your money for The Maze Runner - a truly spectacular film, which I was lucky enough to see at an advanced screening in London! You can check out my NON-SPOILER review for that, here.

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